The downward spiral of human ingenuity

How did we go from



and

to


and god forbid



**A strange note, if you read Garfield with the voice of Jerry Seinfeld it somehow fits really well**

I really miss the days of good newspaper comics like Calvin and Hobbes or The Farside. Comics use to be able to make you laugh, be insightful and also pull at your heartstrings. Unfortunately this is now rare, and when it happens it almost seems accidental. So, I guess, I'll end with this. One of my favorites.

The illusive nature of hooks

Frequently, I lose things. At least I misplace them with such abundance that I usually spend more time searching for a particular good than I actually spend using the damn thing. Many people have this bad habit regarding small and mundane items like their car keys, or their iPod. I suffer in this area as well, but have perfected my affliction frequently misplacing things that, some might say, are rather difficult to lose; hammers, pets, siblings, my car and most recently my entire wardrobe of pants (clean and dirty alike) have all fallen victim to my propensity for misplacement. Frequently I accomplish this while simultaneously using/interacting with the object/person. Essentially, I've gone pro.

While comforting to know I'm highly proficient at something, it's also incredibly inconvenient. As a result I've developed a rather methodical approach to rediscovering my personal property. A method which principally involves walking around my house, hands outstretched [ala Marry Shelly] at eye level. While rather unhelpful while trying to find my parking space or my pet turtle (Speedy. Wasn't I clever?), it often it yields the object I was looking for and periodically the discovery of some other absent minded placement.

It has also led to a rather disturbing observation. Unless something is moving, dramatically colored or placed around eye level it might as well be invisible to the general public. The rampant neglect of public hooks is a perfect case study. Every where we go there are hooks placed for our convenience, which no one uses. Under most bars there are coat hooks. In every stall on every ferry I have been on there are coat hooks on the post. Buses, doctors offices, waiting rooms and probably many more. Once noticed it is hard not to notice them empty, with usually a pile of coats on the seat next to the person using occupying that particular space. Sometimes a friend pull up an extra seat because one has unnecessarily been burdened with a pile of dense outerwear.

What this negligence alludes to on a broader or even a societal level, I have no idea. However, in the future, if I want someone to notice something there is a good chance it will be brightly colored and flashing.

Does anyone fist fight in heven?

Just a thought.

If, by some strange magic, we actually have the good fortune of cosmic continuation after the dismissal of our corporal bodies, what happens?

I don't intend this question to be profound in the manner of, "do we exist as light? Do we enter the fields of Elysium? Or do we simply walk around mildly bored eating second rate diner food served by a mildly uninterested waitress named 'Patty' for the rest of eternity?" or any other speculation regarding the manner in which existence is continued.

Rather, do we remain 'us' in the way in which many of people consider their essence.. or soul. Our preferences.. Will we still disregard the French as standoffish and uppity? Will they still regard us as ignorant, loud and under dressed? Will Caddy Shack still be funny? Will there still be racism, bigotry, culture clashes? What about bar fights over the disputed superiority between Aussie rules or American rules football?

As much as we would like to see our petty differences evaporated and expelled from any continuation, It seems that an across the board dismissal of our petty differences might also be a dismissal of who we are as people. Admittedly petty differences have started countless wars. Millions have fallen solely in the name of country, in the name of money, and most frequently in the name of God. However it seems to be our imperfections which give us not only satisfaction, but a sense of identity. Gentrification is a good case and point. A lot of people realized that perfection and similarity in the shape of the suburbs kinda really sucks. Granted, as yuppies move into lower rent neighborhoods they push out the residents who were already living there and can no longer afford to. And that sucks, but isn't really the point.

Anyway, I know this idea isn't completely flushed out is and probably filled with opportunities for annoyingly astute philosophy students to correct me based on some symantic minutia. Putting forward a philosophical argument is not what I am trying to do, just something interesting to think about.

When getting laid poses problems

I got laid off this week. The worst way to get laid ever.

I did however manage to milk my prodeals and so the following things were purchased.

1 Black Diamond climbing harness
1 Black Diamond ATC XP belay device
12 Black Diamond quickdraws
1 New England Rope

Stories and pictures of my adventures on the faces of rock walls will be soon to follow, hopefully. There may also be pictures of x-rays spawned from an over abundance of zeal available soon too. If so, these will also contain a high level of bodacity.

Hero Worship

Laird Hamilton is my hero, or at least one of my top 3. There are many reasons for this. His spirituality and positive outlook on life. His dedication as a father and husband. His utter humility. The way he innovates, and constantly pushes himself not only as a surfer, but as a human. He is one of the few icons left that children can healthily aspire to be with no ill consequences, and as a result he is respected worldwide by people of all walks of life. Oh yeah, and this is what he does for a living...